FEATURE:
Miss Independence?
IN THIS PHOTO: Ne-Yo/PHOTO CREDIT: Getty Images
Why Ne-Yo’s Comments and Stance Regarding Gender Reassignment and Identity Are Dangerous and Flawed
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I think that…
IN THIS PHOTO: Staff at the Oregon Health & Science University’s Doernbecher Gender Clinic discuss hormone therapy options with a new patient and his mother/PHOTO CREDIT: REUTERS/Lindsey Wasson
if you are wading into an argument or debate around gender reassignment surgery and transgender people, then you need to be armed with the facts and all sides of the spectrum. That goes for gender equality and any other issue. You might have your personal opinion about these subjects but, if you share that and it is seen by millions of people, it can be very dangerous if you are misinformed or are being very subject. There are stats that show how people in the U.S. identify as transgender. In 2022, it was five percent. We are talking about a very small number. I will come to articles which highlight the number of people identifying as transgender, in addition to bringing in conversations around children and young people making that decision – and whether they are being informed and getting the best resources and support. Musicians should be able to speak freely about big issues. I wonder, when it comes to personal opinions around subjects like gender reassignment that may be problematic or controversial, they should be armed with more information and resources – which are freely available and they have no excuse for not access and absorbing. I mention this because U.S. musician Ne-Yo recently made his feelings about gander reassignment (specifically children making decisions around gender) clear. Rolling Stone explain more:
“Over the weekend, Ne-Yo appeared in an interview with Gloria Velez for VladTV in which they criticized parents for allowing their children to have a say in their own gender identity from a young age. Shortly after, the musician issued a statement: “After much reflection, I’d like to express my deepest apologies to anyone that I may have hurt with my comments on parenting and gender identity.” Now, after a little more reflection, Ne-Yo has decided to walked back his apology. “This shit is getting out of hand,” he wrote on Instagram. “I will not be bullied into apologising for having an opinion.”
The singer shared a video recorded in his car in which he stated that he wanted his stance to be made clear “from the horse’s mouth, not the publicist’s computer.” Over the duration of the 2-minute long upload, he attempted to justify his opinion on the matter by stating that he is currently raising five sons and two daughters. “I was asked a question, and I answered the damn question. I have no beef with the LBGTQIA+ community whatsoever,” he said. “Do what you want to do with your kids. However, somebody asked my opinion on this matter, and this is how I feel. I will never be okay with allowing a child to make a decision that is detrimental to their life.”
In his caption, he wrote: “If one of my 7 kids were to decide that he or she wanted to be something other than what they were born as, once they’re old enough and mature enough to make that decision… so be it. Not gonna love em’ any less … But this isn’t even a discussion until they are mentally mature enough to have such a discussion.”
Ne-Yo’s youngest child is four months old, while his oldest is 12.
During the original interview, Ne-Yo crafted hypothetical scenarios about gender identity, including one in which he stated: “If your little boy comes to you and says, ‘Daddy, I want to be a girl.’ And you just let him rock with that? He’s 5 … If you let this 5-year-old boy decide to eat candy all day, he’s gonna do that … He can’t drive a car yet, but he can decide his sex?”
He added: “I just personally come from an era where a man was a man and a woman was a woman. And there was two genders, and that’s just how I rocked. You could identify as a goldfish if you feel like, I don’t care. That ain’t my business. It becomes my business when you try to make me play the game with you. I’m not gonna call you a goldfish. But if you wanna be a goldfish, you go be a goldfish.”
And while he revoked his initial apology and also issued something of a non-apology, he maintained the portion of the statement that committed him to better educating himself on the topic of gender identity. But he made it clear that he has his mind made up already.
“I definitely plan to educate myself a little bit on this matter,” he stated in the video. “However, I doubt that there’s any book anywhere, or any opinion that someone’s gonna tell me, that’s gonna make me okay with letting a child make a decision like that. That’s just period point blank and that’s how I feel. If I get cancelled for this, then you know what? Maybe this is a world where they don’t need a Ne-Yo no more.”
But this conversation is larger than books and opinions. Across the country, anti-LGBTQ+ discrimination has targeted children and teenagers for their identity as well as their parents and families for banding together to protect them. To ensure that their children aren’t harmed, these families have limited their communication to member-only Facebook groups and meetings at undisclosed locations — in secret, these online whisper networks provide guidance for parents and support for their kids.
“Sometimes their kids find friends out of those connections with other trans kids that have been through it,” Allie, a mom who helps moderate a private support group for Texas trans youth and their families, told Rolling Stone last year. “It’s lonely and overwhelming, but when you’re fighting for your kid, you don’t really have much of an option”.
I can understand, to a degree, why some people might not want their own child to make decisions around gender reassignment at a very young age. They should be free to explore the discussion and have access to resources and people who can help and answer their questions. I have recently been reading Gina Martin’s book, “No Offence, But…”. She writes various chapters around gender and sexual consent/social justice. As part of the book, she invited other people to write a chapter around issues relating to, among others, racism, illegal immigration and fast fashion. Rather than write about this issue how most people would, the chapter heading is a particular question relating to that subject. Charlie Craggs’ relates to whether children should be allowed to transition, as they may change their mind. She makes clear that children aren’t having gender reassignment surgery. In the U.K., you have to be eighteen. Children are not being allowed gender reassignment surgery. Treatment and consultation can begin at a lower age but, as Craggs notes, the wait to have surgery can take years. It is not a quick process and, when surgery is completed, the discrimination and hatred still aimed at the transgender community is shocking. There are valuable resources like this. Less than one percentage of the population identify as trans. About one percent of that one percent detransition. Not only is the number very low – one suspects many do identify as trans but are fearful about coming out -, but moist do not regret their decision. The emphasis should be placed on the child if they want treatment or more information. If they identify as a different gender as what is assigned at birth, they should be support. They are not then going into surgery without information and consultation with a doctor.
IN THIS PHOTO: A protester holds the trans flag and snaps in solidarity with other transgender rights advocates at a demonstration outside the Ohio Statehouse on 6th June, 2021/PHOTO CREDIT: Stephen Zenner/SOPA Images/LightRocket via Getty Images)
Above all, it is not down to parents or other individuals as to whether they feel comfortable and it is ‘right’. An archaic attitude stating people are either male and female and stick with that is toxic, harmful, and is a big reason as to why trans people are trolled, attacked, and have a high suicide rate. Craggs argues, in her chapter, that those with concerns should ask themselves why. Why are they upset or angry? Do they know about the transition process? Are they aware of the discrimination trans people face and how hard it is being them? Does that drive their concerns and, if so, what can they do about it? Is the reluctance down to age-old stereotypes and a lack of underlying regarding the gender spectrum? Do they know about the attempted suicide rate and why it is so high? Above all, as Craggs points out too, the people who have an issue with children and teens wh want to get treatment for gender reassignment do not have an issue with cis people making equally or larger life decisions. Gambling, drinking alcohol, smoking and even unprotected sex are things not as inflammatory and divisive as trans people. Why is that seemingly okay or not as misguided, but people who want to make their life better and are unhappy in their skin seen as a bad thing?!
The alternative, sadly, is a life led falsely and one according to other people’s perceptions and sense of what is normal and morally right. Suicide attempts and suicide are all possibilities too. Would they prefer this to someone wanting to be who they want to be?! Last year, Associated Press published an article which said that The World Professional Association for Transgender Health said hormones could be started at age fourteen – that is two years earlier than the group’s previous advice, and some surgeries done at age fifteen or seventeen - a year or so earlier than previous guidance. The group acknowledged potential risks but said it is unethical and harmful to withhold early treatment:
“A leading transgender health association has lowered its recommended minimum age for starting gender transition treatment, including sex hormones and surgeries.
The World Professional Association for Transgender Health said hormones could be started at age 14, two years earlier than the group’s previous advice, and some surgeries done at age 15 or 17, a year or so earlier than previous guidance. The group acknowledged potential risks but said it is unethical and harmful to withhold early treatment.
The association provided The Associated Press with an advance copy of its update ahead of publication in a medical journal, expected later this year. The international group promotes evidence-based standards of care and includes more than 3,000 doctors, social scientists and others involved in transgender health issues.
The update is based on expert opinion and a review of scientific evidence on the benefits and harms of transgender medical treatment in teens whose gender identity doesn’t match the sex they were assigned at birth, the group said. Such evidence is limited but has grown in the last decade, the group said, with studies suggesting the treatments can improve psychological well-being and reduce suicidal behavior.
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Starting treatment earlier allows transgender teens to experience physical puberty changes around the same time as other teens, said Dr. Eli Coleman, chair of the group’s standards of care and director of the University of Minnesota Medical School’s human sexuality program.
But he stressed that age is just one factor to be weighed. Emotional maturity, parents’ consent, longstanding gender discomfort and a careful psychological evaluation are among the others.
“Certainly there are adolescents that do not have the emotional or cognitive maturity to make an informed decision,” he said. “That is why we recommend a careful multidisciplinary assessment.”
The updated guidelines include recommendations for treatment in adults, but the teen guidance is bound to get more attention. It comes amid a surge in kids referred to clinics offering transgender medical treatment, along with new efforts to prevent or restrict the treatment.
Many experts say more kids are seeking such treatment because gender-questioning children are more aware of their medical options and facing less stigma.
Critics, including some from within the transgender treatment community, say some clinics are too quick to offer irreversible treatment to kids who would otherwise outgrow their gender-questioning.
Psychologist Erica Anderson resigned her post as a board member of the World Professional Association for Transgender Health last year after voicing concerns about “sloppy” treatment given to kids without adequate counseling.
She is still a group member and supports the updated guidelines, which emphasize comprehensive assessments before treatment. But she says dozens of families have told her that doesn’t always happen.
“They tell me horror stories. They tell me, ‘Our child had 20 minutes with the doctor’” before being offered hormones, she said. “The parents leave with their hair on fire.’’
Estimates on the number of transgender youth and adults worldwide vary, partly because of different definitions. The association’s new guidelines say data from mostly Western countries suggest a range of between a fraction of a percent in adults to up to 8% in kids.
Anderson said she’s heard recent estimates suggesting the rate in kids is as high as 1 in 5 — which she strongly disputes. That number likely reflects gender-questioning kids who aren’t good candidates for lifelong medical treatment or permanent physical changes, she said.
Still, Anderson said she condemns politicians who want to punish parents for allowing their kids to receive transgender treatment and those who say treatment should be banned for those under age 18.
“That’s just absolutely cruel,’’ she said”.
It all comes down to the wellbeing, safety and happiness of those who want to transition. I think artists like Ne-Yo need to be more nuanced and educated before they share views like this. He may think that he is taking a stand against something he feels is wrong – and has not bothered to do any research or put others first! -, but this can lead to greater stigma and attacks against the trans community. It is not only artists who should be more considered and wary about keeping their personal opinions about issues they should be more educated about private. Quite a few anti-trans public figures use platforms like X to spread hate and misinformation. It is doing a lot of damage. It also inspires others to do the same. For a community who are already attacked and marginalised, they deserve love and support and not judgement and hatred. I think there needs to be more positive conversation from artists about the trans community - who make up a very small part of artists in the industry. They deserve nothing but…
RESPECT and support.